Oh my god, just reading that job description gave me soo much anxiety.
I KNOW this character. Although he may "optimize" himself daily and he thinks he's some kind of high-performing A-player, he's actually a total disaster who has taken on far, far, more than he can handle. He doesn't want to admit that though, he wants to hire someone he can blame for anything that falls through the cracks.
He wants it all (five businessness! 2 workouts a day! a book a week! a thriving social life!) but in order to have that he needs someone to keep all the plates spinning FOR him. The pay range stated is no where NEAR enough for the amount of emotional labour this person will need to put in to manage this guy and reassure him that he is, indeed, the most important and special boy.
He says he doesn't want a robot, but he definitely won't see this Chief of Staff as a real human with their own needs and priorities. He'll expect them to perform perfectly, give up all their time, never say no to him and always put his needs above theirs.
Basically this guy wants to hire a mom.
(Also: "I've personally enjoyed working with this CEO for the last few years. I can tell you that he is truly a really nice, personable and smart guy that has works very hard. He is very smart, thoughtful, strategic, direct, curious, fast learner and a good listener."
I think said CEO was looking over the shoulder of the person writing this... haha)
I’d like to personally commend the bankers affected by bonus reductions—especially those who have made significant sacrifices to their leisure skiing in order to keep the Carbone and branzino-fishing industries afloat.
Oh my god, just reading that job description gave me soo much anxiety.
I KNOW this character. Although he may "optimize" himself daily and he thinks he's some kind of high-performing A-player, he's actually a total disaster who has taken on far, far, more than he can handle. He doesn't want to admit that though, he wants to hire someone he can blame for anything that falls through the cracks.
He wants it all (five businessness! 2 workouts a day! a book a week! a thriving social life!) but in order to have that he needs someone to keep all the plates spinning FOR him. The pay range stated is no where NEAR enough for the amount of emotional labour this person will need to put in to manage this guy and reassure him that he is, indeed, the most important and special boy.
He says he doesn't want a robot, but he definitely won't see this Chief of Staff as a real human with their own needs and priorities. He'll expect them to perform perfectly, give up all their time, never say no to him and always put his needs above theirs.
Basically this guy wants to hire a mom.
(Also: "I've personally enjoyed working with this CEO for the last few years. I can tell you that he is truly a really nice, personable and smart guy that has works very hard. He is very smart, thoughtful, strategic, direct, curious, fast learner and a good listener."
I think said CEO was looking over the shoulder of the person writing this... haha)
I’d like to personally commend the bankers affected by bonus reductions—especially those who have made significant sacrifices to their leisure skiing in order to keep the Carbone and branzino-fishing industries afloat.
Sometimes heroes don’t wear capes.
Unless those capes are made by Brooks Brothers.
"Optimizes himself" daily = a euphemism, for sure 😂
I'm so confused about this song. I can't _really_ be about that? Right? Sweet Jesus